


Try Real Hard

by andsothebladewentsnickersnack



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Gen, I am weak for one thing and it is the reverse harem trope, No Incest, Polyamory, Reader is bisexual, Reader was softly mentally abused, Reader-Insert, Reverse Harem, Slow Burn, Soulmates, slowish burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-13
Updated: 2019-04-03
Packaged: 2019-08-23 02:43:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 11,765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16610357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/andsothebladewentsnickersnack/pseuds/andsothebladewentsnickersnack
Summary: You buy your house within a minute of the barrier's downfall.You rent it out to two skeletons in a matter of weeks.One of those skeletons manages to do something to fill it up with six more skeletons.Aka I'm hopping on the reverse harem bandwagon





	1. Your Past Times Consisted of the Strange

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Look if what I write isn't confusing and bad then did I really write it??? No. This is going to be bad. I'm terrible at dialogue. Why did I start this??

How you came to live with eight skeletons in your fancy house is a question anyone who could get close enough to you to _know_ that about you asks you almost as soon as they know. It had a lot to do with the one of the two skeletons who lived with you originally. It also had a lot to do with the only thing in your life you can truly say you own, which is your house.  
But I suppose if we're gonna argue about it, it has most to do with the barrier at Mount Ebbot breaking about three years ago. 

You had just signed over the majority of your (24 years of) life's savings on a house about an hour away from the barrier. Your parents were loaded, so you got away with not having to pay for anything real up until that point in your life. That's not to say you didn't face your fair share of problems, thought they were problems made much better with the cushion of wealth surrounding you. But as soon as the pen left that paper you were officially on your own. This meant freedom, in a town that was across the country from your parents and their wealth (and their abusive tendencies, but you try not to complain too much considering). Not thirty seconds later, your lawyer's receptionist came in screaming about monsters attacking, which changed your life forever in about a million different ways. The first being the most drastic- your house (ten days later) was officially smack dab in the middle of the very first monster town founded in your lifetime. You lived twenty minutes away from the first Monster Embassy. Your neighborhood was where a lot of important monsters wanted to live, and they ended up filling in.  
You did not have a problem with this. You know what humans are like. Bigots, evil. You promised yourself you would never be like that the very first time you saw someone holding a Nazi flag down the street of your childhood home. And again when your parents met your first girlfriend. And then your first boyfriend. So you become the perfect neighbor, even if you're a neighbor working two jobs to keep up with your monthly bills. It's a big house! It's a really nice house that you got on a bit of a deal because of some sort of haunting nonsense. But you might need roommates. 

Which brings you to change number two- becoming a landlord of sorts. Or at least renting out your home to people or monsters. You figured you'd get a bunch of applications because rent was ridiculously low, but in the end you got two. One from a sketchy looking dude with no job history and two references that didn't pick up, and one from a skeleton monster named Sans. Like comic Sans. Says he comes with a brother, fine. All of his references picked up and had nothing but good things to say - including the Queen of Monsters who picked up when you called the number of the AMBASSADOR OF MONSTERS who, lo and behold, lived TEN MINUTES AWAY FROM YOU. So yeah, a lot changed. 

You picked the skeleton. 

Sans and Papyrus are the third change, and probably the best. They're both wonderful housemates, Papyrus taking classes at the local cooking school, and Sans bringing with him a wide screen TV that came with the copious amounts of gold he had saved up. 

So how did it come to pass that you live with eight skeletons?

"hey _____."  
"Sans."  
"can i have a basement lab?"  
"Absolutely."  
Of course you were stoned out of your gourd but so was he so you figured he was joking.  
The next day you find he was not joking, which is fine by you, but also… concerning. One of your top three rules was 'don't burn my fucking house down', which costs you a dollar to cite! You glance at the swear jar. About halfway full to funding a weekend trip to Montreal with the brothers. You told Papyrus you'd make him poutine, but he declined, saying it had to be authentic or nothing at all.  
That was about two years into living with the brothers. You'd forgotten all about Sans' lab, until the fateful night that was known afterwards (until you grew bored of saying it) as Skellageddon. 

You were lying in your bed (as usual during your down time) when a crash sounded in your basement. Now, this is significant. You do not live in a room particularly close to your basement. In fact, one could say that the only room farther away from the basement than your own room, was the attic. Your house was three beautiful stories with an attic slapped down on top, and a cellar below. You live in the master master bedroom, equiped with a full bathroom. There are three other rooms on the third floor, and a shared bathroom between them. The second floor also had four bedrooms, with two bathrooms between them, and you'd had a small game room set up there. The first floor had your kitchen, a bathroom, a living room, and a large dining room.  
None of this is important, but you like to brag. 

Anyways, you hear a loud, loud crash in your third floor room, that very clearly came from your basement level basement.  
You're down the stairs in a minute, ready to fight whatever transdimensional beastie Sans has summoned. 

It turns out to be six transdimensional beasties, who are all already awkwardly looking around in the low emergency lighting in Sans' lab.  
You reset the breaker wordlessly, then turn to take stock.  
There are four Sans staring at you. And three Papyruses.  
You close your eyes tightly and then open them again.  
Ok. The Sans that you would assume is the original Sans is wearing a white lab coat over his sweatshirt and grinning sheepishly at you. The next available Sans is wearing a blue bandana, and looking around with figurative (or literal?) stars in his eyes. There is a Papyrus worriedly looking down at him, as if assessing him for any injury. This Papyrus is wearing an orange sweatshirt and definitely has a cigarette in his mouth. The next Sans is wearing a black hoodie with a fur lined hood, and definitely looks more like Sans than the Next Available Sans did. His Papyrus looks more like Papyrus than the Next Available Sans' Papyrus did, but like if Papyrus were cosplaying as an evil version of himself. The post post Next Available Sans' Sans looks like Next Available Sans if Next Available Sans was also cosplaying as an evil version of himself, whereas post post Next Available Sans Papyrus looked like he was a weird mix between Next Sans and the Next Available Sans' Papyrus.  
Ok. All in all, pretty straightforward.  
There's silence for all of ten seconds before your (?) Sans says something, which causes them all to break out in chaotic speech that grates into your eardrums like a zester.  
"Hey. HEY!" You call out, which sort of settles down most of them. Next Sans' Papyrus looked like he was gonna start running at you, and evil cosplay of the Next Available Sans was talking to his Papyrus in hushed tones.  
"HUMAN-"  
"HUMAN-"  
They both address you at the same time.  
"I WILL GO FIRST." The Papyrus steps forward. The Sans also steps forward.  
"YOU WILL NOT, PEASANT. I WILL GO FIRST."  
"I AM-"  
"OK! You can both talk to me! Uhm. Sans, I guess, go ahead and go first."  
"I AM THE GREAT AND MALEVOLENT SANS. I AM, HUMAN, GOING TO HAVE TO CAPTURE YOU AND PROBABLY KILL YOU. BUT FIRST I WILL ALLOW YOU TO TELL ME WHERE I AM."  
"I WAS GOING TO SAY THE SAME THING!" Next Sans' Papyrus interjects, fist raised angrily.  
" **s t o p**." Your Sans startles you, appearing by your side in an instant, eyes void of their normal light.  
Dang. Looks like these beasties are in for a bad time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title is from Crying Lightning by the Arctic Monkeys


	2. It Might Make It That Much Easier, It Might Make It Worse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anyways dialogue makes me tired as hell so. writing this probably isn't going to go very well. Hope y'all enjoy, I don't usually write for fandoms with a big following in the reader insert genre.

There were very few things, relatively speaking, that Sans knew he knew with absolute certainty.  
For instance, he could say that his brother, with _absolute certainty_ was the coolest guy ever, period. He knew that the sun was a star that burned 93 million miles away from planet Earth. He knew that breakfast spaghetti, while an incredibly cool idea, didn't really start to make much sense until his (incredibly cool) brother started taking culinary classes. There were very many things that he _thought_ he knew, before coming to the surface. He thought that the stars were the most beautiful thing he could ever see. He was only sort of right about that because he discovered about a year after the barrier broke that the most beautiful thing he could ever see, and possibly the most beautiful sight in the world, was you sitting next to him on a scratchy blanket staring up at the night sky with barely concealed awe, willing to try to look at it from his perspective. Possibly, he mused, you were even more lovely in the dim glow of the caves of Waterfall. Or maybe just when you're dragging yourself out of bed in the morning, trying to wake yourself up enough to properly enjoy Papyrus's breakfast spaghetti pancakes (which were just pancakes that kind of looked like spaghetti).  
Sans knows that in the grand scheme of life and the universe and everything he doesn't know very much at all, but he can say with absolute soul shattering certainty that you are his soulmate.  
Not that he's told you, or anything.  
In his experience, humans have a hard time accepting that their choices don't matter. And for the most part, their choices do matter! But it should have been easy as pie for him and Paps to live in any house near Tori and Frisk, and yet yours was the only one available. Everything pushed the two of you together and he's starting to freak out because you haven't seen it yet, you haven't _felt_ the pulling of your souls together yet- not even in a creepy way, just in a 'our souls are literally drawn to each other' way.  
So he plays the long game, three years long. He's falling in love with you more and more and he's pretty sure you're feeling the same way.  
Well.  
Except for right now.  
He watches silently as you take ten seconds to take stock of what just happened. You close your eyes and open them again, and if he wasn't so nervous he'd think it was cute. Well. He still thinks it's cute, but he's also nervous.  
Sans doesn't know what just happened, but he could guess. Something about the multiverse theory, and different versions of himself and his brother (who would probably be more mad at him than you were, assuming you were mad).  
He should take stock.  
"well, we should probably try to shed some light on whats going on here."  
And the dam breaks. The him closest to him shouts out a loud and angry 'MWEH' as his Papyrus tries to stifle a chuckle. Everyone is talking over everyone else, and a quick glance at you confirms your irritation.  
"Hey. HEY!" Sans would be paying more attention if you weren't so cute all of the time. He shrugs off his lab coat and places it on the desk next to him.  
"Sans, I guess, go ahead and go first."  
Who? Him? No. The other one.  
"I AM THE GREAT AND MALEVOLENT SANS. I AM, HUMAN, GOING TO HAVE TO CAPTURE YOU AND PROBABLY KILL YOU. BUT FIRST I WILL ALLOW YOU TO TELL ME WHERE I AM." Sans isn't sure how serious his counterpart is being, but his bones are rattled. Kill you? Not on his watch.  
"I WAS GOING TO SAY THE SAME THING!" An edgy version of his brother speaks up, raising his fist- at you? Doesn't matter. He shortcuts over to your side.  
" **s t o p**." Immediately the two offending skeletons are held still in a glowing blue light. Their brothers are alert immediately and summon their own weapons, but Sans easily stops them, holding them still.  
" **d o n t m o v e**." Not that they could, "im going to put you down, and youre going to be civil, or ill have to crack some skulls. capiche?"  
There are nods.  
He releases his magic.  
"Ok!" You say, then turn to Sans. "Put them back!"  
He looks over at the machine he was tinkering with, then back to you.  
"i dont think that's gonna happen any time soon, kid."  
"Ok, well. Who are they, then? You and Papyrus but different, right?"  
He fucking loves how smart you are.  
"y-yeah. i think so, anyways. best guess."  
Edgy Papyrus seems to regain his sense of self importance.  
"SEND ME BACK AT ONCE!"  
"i said **b e c i v i l**." He doesn't love having to repeat himself. One and done is good for him. The Papyrus shuts his mouth.  
"theyre gonna have to stay with us until i figure it out."  
"UM. EXCUSE ME!" Sans is fully prepared to be scary again, but it's the blue 'mweh' guy from earlier and he's being polite, so he nods.  
"shoot, short stack."  
"YES. HELLO. I AM THE MAGNIFICENT SANS, AND I AM WONDERING WHERE EXACTLY WE ARE CURRENTLY?" He's avoiding looking at you, Sans notices, though his Papyrus, the one with a cigarette, had been staring at you since you first spoke, cigarette dangling precariously from the corner of his teeth.  
"You're in my house! My name is _____, it's nice to meet you all. I think."  
"Y-YES. HUMAN _-____. IT IS NICE TO MEET YOU FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER."  
"Ok, obviously you're lying, but I'm not gonna push that." You say, and then you make a decision.  
"I only have eight rooms in my house, and now there are 9 beings that need a place to stay for an undetermined amount of time."  
Sans is speaking before he can fully comprehend what he's about to say.  
"ill stay in your room with you."  
"Ok! That's settled then! Until Sans can send you all back, you'll stay in my house. Um. Follow me I guess."  
You give an awkward tour of your house, designating rooms to each monster up until you reach your room. You gesture towards the one beside your own.  
"Right now this is Sans' room. I guess once it's cleared out Papyrus can have it." You point at the one with the cigarettes, "you can smoke in the house but don't burn my house down." You can still smell the faint lingering scent of weed.  
Sans follows behind, keeping an eye on everyone. The smoker is still staring at you, while the 'mweh' guy avoids looking at you. He wonders if they also feel that magnetic pull towards your soul. 

It's two weeks before your stubborn ass gives into the idea of nicknames. You felt bad, honestly, about taking away their names, but it makes for a pretty confusing time when you're trying to get your Sans attention and three other Sans also try to answer you. Plus you'd been feeling _weird_ recently. You'd been happier since the brothers started living with you, but ever since Skellageddon your heart was always filled with feeling, and there was this weird pulling in your chest all the time, only really eased at night once Sans had finally stopped insisting he sleep on your floor and started to sleep on your bed. What are platonic cuddles between a skeleton and a girl with an unrequited crush?  
But still. Nicknames.

"Ok. I've gathered you all here together to discuss an incredibly serious matter. I want to be able to call you all by your names, but it's too fucking -"  
"SWEAR JAR!"  
"confusing." You sigh and look around for your purse. It's lying on the ground by your chair, so you hop up onto your knees on the chair and lean over, unaware of four skeletons staring unabashedly at your ass. You fish out a dollar and plod over to the swear jar, making eye contact with Papyrus, who had yelled at you in the first place. Or, trying to make eye contact, but he's looking in another direction with a deep orange blush on his face. You sit back down. "So I want you all to choose nicknames. I will mediate, nothing inappropriate."  
"You sure you don't want to _ass_ ist, sweet _cheeks_?" Sans' evil twin speaks up. You're not sure what he quite means, but you brush it off.  
"SANS. DO NOT BE DISGUSTING."  
"OK! Uhm, Sans, what do you want to be called?" You ask Next Available Sans first. He seems excitable enough to be into this.  
"blueberry." His Papyrus speaks up, and you excitedly turn your gaze to him.  
"Perfect! Blue for short?" He just nods and you grin at him. He's been avoiding you and you don't like it. You've tried to spend time with all of your new housemates, being a gracious host and all.  
"How about you, Stretch?" There's a beat of silence, and you furrow your brow. Where did that come from? You miss the glance the brothers share in your confusion.  
"stretch... stretch works, honey." He says, and you nod slowly.  
"O-ok. Um-"  
"MY PAPYRUS IS MUTT."  
"Oh, uh, that's not a very nice-"  
"I AM NOT VERY NICE."  
The edgy version of the Next Available Sans stares you down. You look up at his Papyrus, who simply shrugs.  
"if it's what m'lord wants."  
God that's disturbing. But whatever.  
"MAYBE BECAUSE I AM BLUEBERRY, HE SHOULD BE BLACKBERRY?" Blue is beaming at you, though you think that's the norm for his face.  
"THAT IS ACCEPTABLE, THOUGH FEEL FREE TO CALL ME M'LORD AS WELL."  
"Great! Ok! Now, you two!" You turn to edgy Sans and Papyrus.  
"YOU MAY CALL ME EDGE, LIKE THE EDGE OF A SWORD OR AXE."  
"don't suppose it's just cause you're edgy?" Stretch mutters, and the few of you that chuckle are sent glares from Edge.  
"MY LAZY GOOD FOR NOTHING BROTHER WILL BE HENCEFORTH KNOWN AS … RED."  
"sounds _berry_ good, boss."  
"NOT ONLY WAS THAT DESPICABLE, IT DIDN'T MAKE SENSE BECAUSE BERRIES ARE NOT ALWAYS RED."  
"sorry, guess I got _cherried_ away."  
"NYEH."

And that was that. Kinda. Your interaction with Stretch stayed with you, and Sans, who asked you about it later that night when you two were getting ready for bed.  
"so... stretch, huh?"  
"Yeah I've been thinking about that too… I mean it's pretty obvious that-"  
"that alternate you knew him? i definitely think that alternate you knew him."  
"I should talk to him about it."  
Sans paused for a moment.  
"sure. we watching netflix before bed?"  
"Uh, yeah, there's a new season of Great British Baking Show."  
"… nice."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edited 11/15 added some details  
> Title is from The Bad Thing by Arctic Monkeys


	3. Got Me Tangled Like a Bread Tie Twisted, No I Don't Think It's Fair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some stuff happens. Reader is, as she will be, oblivious.

Sans is dying. This arrangement with you- sleeping in your bed, living in the same room as you. Waking up next to you, hand around your waist or phalanges tangled in your hair? Absolute domestic bliss. And it's killing him because he's almost kissed you four times and not being able to is killing him and he's sure that you'd kiss him back but he doesn't want to think about what would happen if you didn't reciprocate. He isn't even sure you know that he's your soulmate. He's definitely sure that you don't realize that the other Sans-personalities are also on your soulmate frequency. This means that Stretch, Red, and Mutt at least are also technically your soulmate. The only other thing that bothers him is Blueberry. Was he also your soulmate?  
His questions dissipate as you shift on his chest in your sleep.  
_God damn_.  
You are so fucking adorable. He's blushing. His soul is pulsing rapidly. Your eyes flutter under your eyelids, face smushed slightly against him. You're drooling, but it's cute. It's a little gross. But it's so fucking cute.  
God, he's head over heels for you. 

Stretch is absolutely done for. One hundred percent _boned_. He can't _not_ think of you, not when you're so close all the time again, it's like you're living in his head. He had a hard enough time letting you go back in his universe, and now here you were in this new universe, this new life he had to get used to, and honestly? He could get used to it.  
But _you_.  
He's all twisted up inside, this you is so different from _his_ you and he's falling in love again just as fast. You look the same, but different. Your hair is different, and he's pretty sure your chest is too, but he'd have to feel you up to be positive and he's not going to do that. Yet.  
He's having trouble sleeping. It's not _fair_.  
You're making breakfast, which he just knows his brother would love. God, he missed being able to just walk up behind you, lean into you. He wondered if you used the same shampoo, if you still smelled so sweet, and he wondered if you felt the soulmate pull, too.  
He's gonna take a chance. Maybe even the odds between him and your universe's brothers. Maybe get the chance to be with you again. He steps towards you, making sure his footfalls are loud.  
"whatcha making, honey?" He slides up behind you, leaning down uncomfortably to rest his head in the crook of your neck, nuzzling into you.  
"O-oh! Stretch! I'm making um-" He slides his arms around your waist, pulling you into him slightly.  
"you ok?" He doesn't want to make you uncomfortable, but he doesn't want to put you on the spot.  
"Oh! J-just peachy!!" You say, voice only slightly strained. He can feel the heat rise on your face as he relaxes into you.  
"Pancakes!" You suddenly say, pulling a chuckle from Stretch. He breathes in deeply.  
Same shampoo. Same sweet smell.  
"smells good."  
"those pancakes sure do, _pal_." Stretch feels you jump beneath him, and gives you enough wiggle room to face Sans slightly.  
"not your pal, buddy." He responds nonchalantly.  
"not your-"  
"Let's not start this," you say, "or I'll have to _cake_ you both out."  
Stretch watches as Sans relaxes, and his grin becomes less strained.  
"sure thing, kiddo. wouldnt want you to have a _waffle_ time."  
Stretch breathes in to hit you with a pun, but your smell takes him off guard again.  
"say, stretch, i think blue is calling you." Sans says, and Stretch sighs.  
On one hand, he's having a good time right here, and Blue is most definitely not calling him. On the other, if Sans were to get too angry, Stretch definitely would not be able to win the fight.  
Oh well, he knows when to retreat.  
He grabs a pancake from the steadily growing stack, and presses a pseudo kiss to your jaw.  
"thanks for breakfast, sweet stuff."  
And he's gone. 

 

You almost can't describe the feeling that pulls at your chest when Stretch drapes himself over you. It's warm, and at the same time cold. It's definitely _pulling_. It feels really really nice, like when you wake up (platonically. Nothing more than that, you're positive he's not interested! More monsters are touchy feely than not.) tangled up in Sans. He offered to show you your soul, once, but it felt wrong. At the time you'd known him for a month. It felt rushed. If he asked again, you'd probably say yes, just because you're curious, and because you've spent enough time with him that it doesn't feel like a step too far in your relationship.  
"whatcha makin', honey?"  
You feel his arms slide around your waist, his jaw digging into your sensitive neck. Was he _trying_ to kill you?  
You stutter out an answer, and feel him smell you. You're not creeped out so much as you are oddly aroused.  
"smells good." You can't help the shiver that carries itself up your spine. He must have been talking about the pancakes- why did it feel like he was talking about you? Oh well, teach you not to assume.  
You're concentrating on the feeling of Stretch's bones on your back, too caught up in the odd pulling in your chest to notice Sans until he speaks.  
"those pancakes sure do, pal."  
You jump slightly, wiggling around enough to see Sans. Does he think you're uncomfortable? I mean, you're not _not_ uncomfortable, but it's not necessarily a bad uncomfortable.  
"not your pal, buddy." The soft vibrations of his voice against your neck distract you for a moment from what was about to happen.  
"not your-"  
"Let's not start this." You say, snapped out of the fogginess that being this close to someone attractive brings, "or I'll have to _cake_ you both out."  
Sans responds with another pun. Thank God you wouldn't have to sit through that shit again.  
Stretch grabs a pancake, and before you can protest he presses his face to your jaw in a sort of kiss. You feel a flush rocket up your face.  
"thanks for breakfast, sweet stuff."  
You know it's just a pun, and he was probably just being friendly, but you can't help the heat rising to your face.  
Sans is staring you down, though, smile slightly strained.  
"Oh, uhm, thanks for the rescue, but it was nothing I couldn't handle!" You say, forcing a grin and a thumbs up. Wow, Sans sure is a good friend, always looking out for you like that.

 

Sans resists the urge to face palm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title is from Around My Head by Cage the Elephant


	4. Take A Look At Myself, And I Stop And Stare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lil snippet chapter bc I haven't been feeling up to writing recently. Gotta stay motivated!

Sans knows there's a lot to unpack about you. 

Firstly, your parents were _assholes_. You don't like to make a big deal out of it because you know a lot of people have it a lot worse and it's not like they ever _hit_ you or anything but they manipulated you and turned you into this insecure and sad person. It didn't show in all of your behavior, you appeared to be a happy and well adjusted adult, but he's seen you during your down times and it kills him.   
He's not sure he'd be this emotionally invested if you weren't his _soulmate_. 

He's been flirting with you for three whole years, and you haven't given any inclination that you even understand he's flirting with you, which is incredibly frustrating for him. He's positive you didn't perceive Stretch's touchiness as flirting despite the fact that he _kissed your jaw_ , and it was kind of ridiculous that you thought monsters were just always this touchy feely. It's not _just_ that though, and he knows it. He knows you're battling major depression and don't feel comfortable asking for help or therapy because of your _shitty_ parents. He knows a large part of why you can't see anyone flirting with you is because you built up your self hatred over years and years and years and now the thought of anyone even thinking about flirting with you without being very direct was as alien to you as, well, an alien. He knows this, and is frustrated by this to absolutely no end. 

He remembers the first time you came home crying. 

"hey kid, i- woah, everything alright?"   
"Don't ask me that. I'm just gonna go to bed.  
"no, im gonna ask you that. why are you crying?" _Who made you cry?_  
"It's… it's really stupid and I'm being stupid and it's not even a good reason to be upset."   
"hey, if you're stupid i gotta be one hell of a bonehead. if you're upset i dont think it could be for a bad reason." _Tell me how I can help._  
"It's... So… I don't… have very many friends. And I don't mean that in a pitiable way, like, quality over quantity right?" You look at him with a certain panic in your eyes.   
"hey, it's a big world. gotta grab onto the good ones. no judgement here."   
"Ok… I... I just keep trying to make plans with one of my friends. Like, after work, and I'm… She's probably my best friend, and I know I'm not hers, which is fine!"   
The way you said that made his heart break.  
"And… I don't know, I tried to make plans with her today and she said yes to them but when I got out of work she had already left and I know it shouldn't bother me because it's not like they were solid plans! It's just… it happens every time I try to hang out with her."  
"that sounds like a pretty ok reason to be upset to me, pal."   
"No, she's going through a lot! She doesn't need me to be a burden on her!"  
"you're not being a burden, you're just trying to hang out with a friend."   
"I… I'm really just gonna go to sleep, Sans. Good night."   
He fucking knows you dont believe him and he hates it. So much.   
"…night." 

But it was still a win because now when he asks you tell him why you're crying, and you let him try to talk you down.  
He could go into extreme detail about all of your problems which is definitely _bad_ , but he could also talk for days about every little thing he wants to do to help you, so he's pretty sure it evens out. He's just glad you let him in to begin with, and even when he's worried sometimes, when you cry in your sleep or have nightmares, all he needs to do to feel better is feel you in his arms. Bones. Arm bones. You know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title is from How Are You True by Cage the Elephant


	5. A Brief Plot Intermission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Welp, I've pretty much finished up the whole set up bit for the plot, so while I go about gathering up the will to keep writing, here's a little filler. There are probably typos, sorry bout that, but I'm exhausted and want to give you guys something. Thanks for bearing with me! Here's a lil back story with some fluff
> 
> (Tori and the Gang definitely knows about the soulmate thing jsyk! )

The first time you got sick Sans freaked the fuck out.  
You were lain there, shivering in bed for more than a day when he found you. At the time, asking Papyrus for help seemed like a really good idea. After you calmly, if not stuffily, explained the situation to him, he realized it was in fact a bad idea to ask Papyrus for help. He had typed your symptoms into the Google search bar and Google had dutifully spat out a bunch of webMD links to articles on cancer.  
"Thats not even my zodiac sign," you say weakly, and he chuckles.  
" _gemen_ i'm surprised. what… what is your sign?" He asks, voice gentle.  
"I… cant remember."  
You couldnt. 

A lot of your friendship was filled with little firsts like that, the first time you threw up in front of him, the first time he walked in on you going to the bathroom. That one had been particularly uncomfortable.  
"that is… pretty nasty."  
"You don't… defecate? I refuse to believe you've never hesrd of humans bodily functions."  
"of course we do. and of course I have. i just didn't think it'd be so… gross."  
"What, you shit out sunshine and rainbows?"  
"no, it's like… magic discharge."  
You make a gross face.  
"what? i didnt mean to gross you out _intestine_ aly." 

Your relationship also encompassed a fair amount of lasts, most noticeably the last time you spoke to your parents (and the last time you would if he had anything to say about it)  
"Yeah, no mom, I can't make it to Thanksgiving this year."  
He can barely make out the voice on the other end of the phone.  
"Oh, because it's all about you? As always."  
"No, look, I'm just scheduled really heavily and its- I mean-"  
"You're so full of shit."  
He had blanched at that- how do you speak to your own child that way?  
"Think about what your sister has to go through! Or even what your father and I have to go through? You know that this holiday is important."  
Sans can see your deer in the headlights look. You don't know what's safe to say, and he knows it.  
"I know you're doing this to hurt me. Just reconsider."  
The way she says it leaves little argument.  
"I… ok. I'll think about it."  
Your mother hangs up on you. Ten minutes later your phone buzzes, and you check it.  
Your mom had texted your family's group chat.  
______ is not coming to Thanksgiving._  
"hey. do you want to go to dinner with your family?"  
"I… I do."  
You don't sound like it.  
"really? because i know a shortcut, it would take travel time down to almost nothing at all. but if you don't want to go ill drop it."  
"I… want to see my extended family. Just… not them."  
"we'll go then."  
"You don't have to, I'm sure you have your own, uh, things, with the ambassador and the q-queen."  
"oh yeah, you're invited to that. but it's the friday after your normal turkey day. not really a big monster holiday."  
"I- I'm honored, of course I'll go. And… thanks for coming with me. Paps should come too!"  
"nah, he has training. besides, he'd probably be pretty mad. I hear there's gonna be an extra serving of couch _potato_ "  
You giggle.  
"I don't even know if that counts as a pun, you nerd.  
"i think you're just _green beaned_ with jealousy." 

You arrive at your uncle's house with an hour before dinner starts, you greet your sister and uncle warmly, as well as your uncle's husband. And their dog. The dog gets exceptionally warm greetings from you.  
"So you're the Mr Sans Serif I heard about." Your uncle says, arms crossed. He's wearing his favorite red flannel, and must have just come in from splitting wood because a long axe is hooked into his super cool utility belt that isn't just a modded fanny pack. It makes him look like a lumberjack. His husband puts a gentle hand on his arm.  
"It's nice to meet you."  
"yeah, im sans. sans the skeleton." He reaches a bony hand out to shake your uncle's, "i gotta say, i like the way you _axe_ essorize."  
It takes your uncle a second, but his eyes light up as he shakes Sans' hand.  
You suppose you could always count on his terrier sense of humor.  
"Oh! You must be Sans!"  
"that's me." He reaches out to shake your mother's hand. "its a pleasure to meet you." 

And then it's off. Your sister loves him because she also loves puns, and your father accepts him as soon as he matches his crushing grip. He's in, and you breathe a sigh of relief. 

The food is good as always, and Sans seems to manage eating the polite amount. Everything is great until it's you and your mother alone in the hall.

Sans can just make out the conversation.  
"Glad you decided to come." You mother says, and he can feel you stepping into the danger zone.  
"Sans offered to drive." It wasn't a lie, but he couldn't help but snort at the inside joke.  
"I can't believe you're doing this. You know how important today is to me."  
"W-what?"  
"Bringing a skeleton! I dont have any issue with monsters but you're going to alienate your family!"  
"Mom, no one else cares!"  
"They're just being polite! Why do you always make it about you? You're so selfish. I can't believe I raised you."  
Holy shit. Sans looked around. Everyone else had heard as well, and the two of you were still out in the hall.  
"is this..?"  
"Yeah. She's just like that." Your sister tells him, pity and understanding in her eyes.  
"Allison." You father says, sounding almost tired.  
"I don't have to defend her. You know she can be..."  
"I love your mother."  
"apparently you don't love your daughter enough to stop whatever is going on out there." Sans says, staring your dad down.  
"You don't understand. She'll get over it. And _____ is a tough kid."  
"she shouldn't have to take bullshit like that."  
"You are a guest-" your father starts, but your uncle interrupts him.  
"In my home. Look, I agree with you. But if you say anything it will just get worse. I can… I'll go talk to her."  
Your uncle leaves the table, and a few minutes later Sans hears your mother again.  
"And now you've managed to embarrass me in front of the family."  
"I… ok." You respond, and your sister catches Sans eye.  
"You should probably make sure she's ok." 

You are decidedly not ok.  
As in, Sans decides that you're not ok. You're not really responding, or making eye contact. Your gaze is always just past his head and your eyes wide, but resigned, like a sentient deer caught in the middle of the road, knowing full well it's going to be hit by a car. He places a hand gently on your lower back and shortcuts both of you to your home.  
The next day you ignore several calls from your parents as you attend Toriel's Thanksgiving dinner.  
It's so _warm_ the second you walk into the door and you're reminded of how family dinners used to be before you got older and the damage of your parents style of parenting started taking it's toll. Table set for ten, always a place available to anyone who wants to come.  
"It's wonderful to see you again, my dear!" Toriel wraps you in a hug and you feel so blessed to have her in your life. You'd met her once or twice before when she was visiting you and Sans. The house is beautiful, the smell of monster food and human food mingling together in a cornucopia of spices. There are several Thanksgiving wreaths up, cranberries and fir tree branches woven together expertly. Frisk explains to you that they were purchased as a fundraiser for their school's new snail racing team, before they take the sweet potato & marshmallow casserole from your hands and bring it to the table.  
"Ah! Frisk, I think that's a dessert!" Toriel says, and you smile at her.  
"No, no, it's uhm, it's sort of a tradition to eat it with dinner. Normally it's just pies for dessert." You say, then backtrack quickly, "But I completely understand if you'd rather have it as a dessert! It's pretty sweet!"  
"Oh, no! Tradition is tradition!" She says with a sense of finality, and despite your anxiety you get the feeling she's not mad at all. Which is actually really reassuring.  
"HEY! PUNK!"  
That's all the warning you get before you're being crushed in the grip of an overenthusiastic fish who hasn't seen you in a few weeks. Undyne visits pretty regularly, and the two of you actually get along really well.  
"U-Undyne, I-I-I think you're hurting-"  
"NAH! We have the strength of FRIENDSHIP! Nothing can hurt that!" She's definitely yelling way too close to your ear, but it's really very nice to see her again. You wave a small hello to Alphys, who waves back.  
When Undyne finally let's you go you're swept up in another hug, this time from Papyrus.  
"Hello Human!" You're ever so grateful that he's been working on volume control because whatever he makes noise from is very close to your ear right now.  
"It Has Been A Few Days! It Is Good To See You Again!" He says, squeezing you a little tighter, and you return the sentiment before asking to be put down. 

There's a knock at the door very suddenly and you start.  
"Oh! I'm not expecting... Hmm. _____, Sans, would you mind?" Toriel asks.  
"Of course not!" You say, the warm mood infecting you with cheer.  
You and Sans move back through the hall and pull open the door. 

"Did you lose your house already?" Your mother asks, and you gawk.  
"How did you?"  
"You left your location on. What did you expect? You make a scene at dinner yesterday and then refuse to answer your father and I's calls? You're acting like a child. I'm coming in."  
"stop." When you turn to look at Sans, his eye lights are gone. He wordlessly steps outside and closes the door behind him, cutting you out of the conversation.  
Honestly you're not mad about it, too confused to do anything other than stand and stare at the door. 

You're not sure what he says to her, but she ends up leaving.  
She doesn't call you after that day, and you're honestly relieved, deciding to call her when you're ready.  
Still, you have to wonder what Sans said to her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No song lyric title this time, but if I were to choose a lyric it would probably be  
> You can get anything you want at Alice's restaurant (excepting Alice) from the song Alice's Restaurant by Arlo Guthrie , because in my household it's a tradition to listen to that song at noon on Thanksgiving day. Happy turkey day, folks!!!


	6. Our Mother Made Us Into Swimmers (She Threw Us Straight Into That River)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one took a hot minute to crank out lmao. Anyways Ive come up with an actual plot for this to follow.

hey sweet thing, whatcha doin?"   
You nearly shriek, not having heard Stretch approach you from behind.   
"I- Jesus H, Stretch, I think you're trying to kill me."  
"HE CAN BE QUITE SNEAKY."   
You're surprised by Blueberry's sudden appearance as well, this time startled into dropping the knife you're holding. Stretch easily catches it with his magic, and you smile at him gratefully as you reaffirm your grip.  
"I'm making lunch."   
"YOU SEEM TO COOK A LOT! IF THAT IS AN INTEREST OF YOURS?"   
"Actually yeah, I took a couple of cooking courses at the university I went to. I got kind of into it, I probably would have changed my major to culinary if they offered more than just introductory courses and I wasn't so set on -"   
You're interrupted very suddenly by the sound of a door slamming open and a panicked 'Nyeh!' from the culprit, followed by a quiet apology to the door and wall.   
Papyrus had been out for a week or so. Which meant that he hadn't met any of the doubles, and unless Sans texted him, which you very much doubt, he had no clue about the situation.  
"I Am Home!"   
"We're in the kitchen, Paps! How was your trip?"   
"Very Nice! Undyne And I Very Much Enjoyed Our Bro's Week... What…. What Is…"   
"About that..."  
"hey bro." Sans teleports in in the nick of time, "your phone dead?"   
"Yes! It Died Very Quickly! Why Is There Another You? And Another Me?"   
"well. i had a kind of accident in the lab. you could say it was a uh… _clone_ -tastrophe."   
"lame."  
"NO!"  
"Lazy And Bad! But I Suppose It Was Bound To Happen At Some Point!"  
"you mean me accidentally somehow pulling us from alternate universes into our universe."   
"Well, No, Sans. No, I Suppose I Didn't Expect That Specifically! However You Do Spend More Than Half Of Your Time Down In That Lab, Which, I _Suppose_ Was Why You Didn't Text Me About The Situation!"   
Sans looks appropriately guilty.   
"HELLO! I AM SANS-COMMA-THE-MAGNIFICENT, BUT FOR THE TIME BEING I'VE BEEN GIVEN THE NICKNAME BLUEBERRY."   
"Hello Blueberry! I Am Papyrus! Welcome To Our Universe! I Do Not Mean To Be Rude, But Maybe You Could Lower Your Volume Somewhat? I Admit I Had The Same Volume Control Issue, However Humans Have Sensitive Ears!"  
"OH- Oh! WELL! WHY- Why Didn't You Say Something, Human _____?"   
Honestly you hadn't spoken much with Blueberry.  
"'m stretch. blue's brother."   
"Nice To Meet You!"  
And with that whole matter apparently settled, you turned back to making lunch. Blueberry offers to introduce Papyrus to everyone, and they head upstairs. You chop the bacon with a swift efficiency as Stretch leans over your shoulder.   
"whatcha makin'?"   
"Lunch." You reply, shooting him a grin. "I'm making bacon mac and cheese."   
He leans into you, groaning.  
"sounds amazing, honey."   
"it is." Sans says, circling around to your other side and hopping up onto the counter, "and as much as i love conversing with everyone, the reason i came up was because i need help on the machine."   
You drop the bacon into the pan.   
"what's cookin', good lookin'? whatcha _bacon_?"  
You're startled, not for the first time and definitely not for the last time, by a teleporting skeleton.   
"bacon mac." Sans answers for him, "i need you two to help me work on the machine. and mutt, if he's up for it."   
"you called, classic?" You nearly shriek this time, Mutt appeared directly in front of you as you were starting to head for the fridge. You almost fall backwards but Mutt easily wraps a large hand around your waist, catching you and pulling you close.  
"sorry bout that, pumpkin."   
His face is close to yours, red eyelight focused on your face, on your mouth.   
"hey." Sans says, a warning in his tone. Mutt places you down.  
"Oh! I'm sure he didn't mean to scare me. I just… startled easily!" You reassure Sans, not particularly wanting a misunderstanding in the middle of your kitchen while you were working.   
"… anyways. i don't know if im gonna be able to mess with the machine on my own to get you guys back."  
"fine by me." Red says, stealing a piece of bacon out of the pan. You glare at him as you fish the rest of the pieces out, then drop in a few tablespoons of butter. He just winks at you and runs his glowing red tongue over his teeth.   
Sans starts to speak again just as you start to whisk in flour.   
"i need your help." He says flatly, and Mutt chuckles.  
"sure sounds like it. what if we don't want to help you?"   
"im sure i could persuade you." Sans replies. The room goes oddly cold, so you turn around from your mac and cheese.   
"Stretch, can you grab the milk from over there and hand it to me? Thanks." Sans has one eyelight out and is staring down Mutt and honestly? It's kinda sexy. But you flush that thought right down the metaphorical drain and get back to work on your cheese sauce.   
"ok."  
"good. come on."   
"right now?" This time Stretch speaks up, and you look over at him.  
"The machine is important! I'll bring down some food for all of you once it's ready!"   
"im more upset about losing your company, honey."   
"You don't have to schmooze to get food, Stretch." You grab a bag of cheddar and dump it into the sauce, and when you turn around they're all gone, but Papyrus is standing there.   
"So How Long Has Stretch Been Flirting With You!" Papyrus says, and you roll your eyes.  
"He's not flirting with me."  
"OK, Clearly You're Blind, But Mutt Certainly Was! Dont Think I Didn't See That Fall!"   
"Paps, I'm pretty sure it's just a thing where they're from. Red is the same way."   
"Dear God. Well. I Met The Rest Of Them! They're All Certainly... Interesting!"   
"Yeah, they definitely are." You stir the macaroni into the cheese and drop in the bacon.   
"They All Seem To Have Manners, At Least!"   
"Yeah," and they all do! All of the Papyrus-esque monsters in terms of personality were very polite. Even the ones who had threatened you. Once they realized that this world was much kinder than their own, they had kind of calmed down. "Honestly I've spent more time with the Sans-personalities." You say, and Papyrus smiles down at you.

Of course. If their souls are the same, they'd also be your soulmate. And their brothers would probably also fall for you just as quickly as he, the Great Papyrus had. And then they'd realize that Sans is your _soulmate_ and they'd back off. He just wants what's best for his brother, and that's you. Even if you're dense as a rock sometimes. All the time. Seriously. It's astonishing, and he can't help but wonder what sort of environment made you that way.   
"Should I Call The Others For Lunch?"   
"Just let them know. They can mosey on down when they feel like it."  
"Aye Aye!" 

As he climbs the stairs he cant help but look back at you.  
Maybe it's a good thing this all happened. After all, he's pretty sure if Sans sees all of these others as competitors, he might step up his game.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title is from Ways to Love by Jason Webley. It's a good song.


	7. I'm Flying Like A Bird To You Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Woah two chapters in one day it's almost like I'm terribly unprofessional and only write every once in a while lmfao. But the plot moves forward or whatever. Mutt can't catch a fucking break, he's just tryna get a good meal.

It's _early_. Too early. But you have a lot to do today, you have to go grocery shopping, you have work later, and you have to go shopping for something else, as well, but you can't quite remember. It can wait until after you wake yourself up, though. You groan and pull on a shirt, not bothering with pants this early in the morning. You're wearing a pair of panties that say 'eat meowt' on the ass, with a little cat face. You can't remember if you picked them up as a joke or not.

You trudge downstairs to the kitchen. God, why would you choose a room on the top floor of your ridiculous gigantic house? Why did you buy such a big house? You honestly don't have any friends. Though you suppose Papyrus and Sans live with you, and they have a lot of friends. That works. In the end your decision was fucking great. You make it to the kitchen and start toasting some eggo waffles. You'd be damned if you ate anything nutritious before noon.  
You take a peek through the fridge, looking for something tasty to drink. Milk- blech. Water? Not really feeling it. Hmm. It's fall, there's apple cider, maybe if you heated it up? You wonder absentmindedly if you had any chai tea (probably), your favorite cafe had a chai tea brewed in apple cider recently and that had been tasty as hell- and your toaster pops. Hmm. You'll have to settle for hot cider. So you set about heating up a cup of cider.   
The silence of the morning is always your favorite part of waking up early. The darkness interrupted only by the soft glow of the kitchen lights and the smell of food. The silence is comforting like a blanket wrapped around you, and only interrupted by the early birds and the occasional clinking of pots and pans, you muse as you grab a pot from the cupboard. Only to release a catastrophically loud crash as all of the pans that the pot you chose had been holding up (which was all of them) decided to fall out of the cupboard.   
Good feeling gone.   
You cuss as you drop to your knees and start to shove the damn things back into the cupboard.  
"hey honey you ok- _oh_."   
You start, whacking your head on the cupboard and causing your leaning tower of pots onto you, effectively trapping you for at least sixty seconds. That's what you needed to do today! You wanted to pick up dry erase boards for everyone's rooms! You had kinda forgotten about the whole cloning thing in your morning haze.  
"God, Stretch, don't fucking sneak up on me-"   
"everything ok-" Sans appears (you assume, you're rubbing your head and trying to free your hand from the trap you've created),"stars, _____."   
"I know, I'm a mess. Can someone help me out?"   
"you mean 'help meowt'?" Sans leans down next to you and starts to shift pans around with magic, muffling the clinking.   
"What?" Then it dawns on you. "Oh. Uh. That's... Awkward. I'm pretty sure I bought these as a joke."  
"they're definitely something. dunno if id call them a joke…"   
Sans finally helps you get out of the cupboard, and you sit back. His face is a bright blue, and Stretch's a bright orange. Both of their smiles are strained.   
"Sorry guys, I'll uh, try to remember my pants next time. Kinda forgot that... You were here." You stand and start to head for the stairs, only to see a very amused Mutt staring back at you.  
"baby, you can forget your pants whenever you want."   
A blush flies up to your cheeks and your conversation with Papyrus comes back to mind. He thought Mutt was flirting with you, but you were sure it was just an… edgy version thing.   
"Ahhh, haha, uh, I'm gonna…" you sneak past him and he doesn't try to hide that he's watching you (your ass) walk up the stairs.   
"hey _____?" He calls out, and you turn to say something but stop at the borderline manic smirk on his face, "im more of a _dog_ guy, but id eat your-"   
"nope." Sans appears in front of him and you shoot them both a confused look before dashing upstairs to change. 

"youre on thin fucking ice, buddy." Sans fancies himself a nice guy. A patient guy. But that was- that _is_ his soulmate.  
"why, classic? what's wrong with me flirting with my _soulmate_?"   
Stretch groans at that, and Sans has to agree with the sentiment.  
"this is my universe. just because your souls match up doesn't mean she's your soulmate. you have one in your universe and when you go back you can find her."   
"if we go back." Stretch interrupts, and Sans sighs.  
"you too?"   
"yup. red too, if i had to guess by all the sweat."   
"shit." Sans says, and he rubs his temples. Suddenly your footfalls sound coming down the stairs.  
"we should wait to talk about till red wakes up." Mutt says, and Sans nods. 

The three of them sorta watch you eat your breakfast in silence, which is kinda creepy, but you don't seem to mind. You do seem to put about 16 fluid ounces of maple syrup on your two tiny eggo waffles but its more cute than it is disgusting, at least to a couple of infatuated skeletons who regularly clear out the condiment aisle at the supermarket. 

They don't have to wait long for Red, who appears downstairs in the lab about an hour after you give an awkward goodbye and leave. 

"family meeting." Sans says, and Red immediately grins.  
"bout time you brought that up, _classic_." Which leads into an awkward silence.

"so shes our soulmate." Mutt says first.  
"she's _my_ soulmate, and you three need to leave her alone. i get dibs." Sans says, and Stretch arches a browbone.  
"even if you could call dibs on a living being, which you _can'ttold_ her?"   
"we live together, its not like it could hurt her-"   
"coulda hurt you." Red interjects, and Sans groans, dragging his fingers down his face.   
"you can't tell her. she'll think i…"   
"then you can't stop us or get mad at us for flirting anymore." Mutt says quickly, and Sans fixes him with a hard stare for a few deathly silent moments.  
"fine."   
"shake on it. with each of us."   
And he does. And with each semi uncomfortable bone grinding shake he feels like he's signing away his soul. 

"I'm back!"   
Your voice calls out as he finally gets to Mutt, whos grin seems to widen as he takes his hand in a crushing grip.  
"may the best bones win."   
Then he's gone.

 

You gasp as Mutt appears in front of you, holding most of the groceries you had just bought.   
"Jesus, M-Mutt, don't do that."   
"sorry doll, just wanted to finish our conversation from earlier."   
"Hmm. I changed, though, so the joke wouldn't be funny."   
"oh sweetheart, it wasn't a-"  
"Hello! I See You Have Stolen My Job As Head Of Grocery Retrieval!"   
You grin at Papyrus.  
"Don't worry, Paps, you're irreplaceable."   
A large blush spreads across his face.   
"Of Course! Say, _____, I Know You Are Working Today! Perhaps Upon Your Return We Could Watch A Movie!"   
"That sounds great, actually. We haven't had a movie night in months!"   
"I Will Invite My Counterparts! That Way We Can All Bond!"   
You shoot him a smile, then ask him to please put the groceries away while you out the dry erase boards on everyone's door. 

The day moves by fairly quickly, and you don't have to stay too late at work. You arrive at home at 10:50, which is pretty early compared to the standard. Papyrus is sitting on the couch excitedly chatting with Blueberry and Blackberry.   
"Welcome! We Are Watching Mettaton!"   
It was his turn to pick, you supposed, and you plopped yourself down between him and Black.  
"HELLO. HOW… HOW WAS WORK?" He asks awkwardly, and you shrug.  
"So-so. Went by quickly though."   
"I AM VERY EXCITED TO SEE THIS UNIVERSE'S NAPTATON!"   
"I MUST ADMIT I AM ALSO INTRIGUED." Black and Blue seem to get along, which is… nice. They're similar.   
"Mettaton Is Very Talented!" 

And thus the movie starts. Halfway through Blue and Papyrus are snoozing and Black clears his throat.  
"Hmm?" You ask, half paying attention to the movie.  
"I WAS WONDERING ABOUT GETTING A LICENSE TO FIND A JOB." He says, bluntly, and you're honestly... Kind of shocked.  
"I HAVE NOTICED HOW MUCH YOU WORK AND… ON TOP OF THAT… IN MY UNIVERSE I WAS CAPTAIN OF THE ROYAL GUARD. YOU CAN IMAGINE HOW MUCH OF MY ENERGY THAT TAKES UP. AS WELL AS HAVING TO BE A GENERALLY AWFUL AND MERCILESS BEING IN ORDER TO SURVIVE. ID LIKE TO CONTRIBUTE TO THE HOUSEHOLD, ESPECIALLY BECAUSE WE DONT KNOW HOW LONG WE'LL BE HERE."   
"I mean, you don't have to, but I can understand wanting to work… Papyrus or Sans can get you the paperwork. If they try to say no, I'll get them to see it your way."  
"I… THANK YOU. ITS BEEN A… WEIRD TRANSITION AND YOUVE HELPED MUTT AND I… AND EVERYONE, HONESTLY. SO THANK YOU." He gives you a tired, grateful smile, and you feel your heart beat slightly faster in your chest. It's punctuated by Papyrus leaning over into your side, snuggling around you. You roll your eyes, but sort of lean into him anyways. Looks like it's a couch night for you.  
The last thing you sort of remember thinking before you finally fall asleep is how fucking _boned_ you are, having a kinda crush on basically everyone you live with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title from Shrike by Hozier
> 
> Also this is never edited! I never proofread this! Mosty I write it at 12 am so that's why! If you want to let me know if I spell something wrong or do annoying grammar things just, you know, don't be a dick about it but tell me.


	8. I'm Your Dapper Cadaver Making Funeral Plans (For The Us That Was Not Meant To Be)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's a shorter chapter but it's the end of what I consider to be the first arc of this fic. There will be three arcs total, so we're only about a third of the way through. I want to clarify that this will have a happy ending. I hope you guys enjoy, I'll probably take a little break before breaking into the next little plot arc I have planned :)

You wake up to a grinning, skeletal face incredibly close to your own.  
"mornin' doll." Red is grinning down at you and when you jolt backwards in surprise you realize you're stuck. Movie night was last night, right. Papyrus was wrapped around you and Black was leaning on you, both of them jostled and starting to wake up from your scare.  
"SANS, STOP BEING CREEPY." Edge is standing in the doorway, disapprovingly looking down at Red.   
"sorry boss. can't help it."  
"YES, YOU CAN." 

Edge was sort of a mystery to you. You rarely see him except for mealtimes, and you're pretty sure it was like that on purpose. He was always at least somewhat polite, if not loud, though he always seemed… uncomfortable. You wonder if it's at all to do with what Blackberry mentioned the night before. 

Papyrus seems to wake fully when Edge starts talking/screaming, and he gives you a short hug before disentangling himself. This wakes up Black, who gives a reluctant 'good morning' to everyone before heading to the kitchen for coffee. You turn to Paps, who's stretching out his back.  
"Hey Papyrus. Black brought up a good point last night about maybe getting some identification papers drawn up so that he can work, and I was wondering what the process was for that."  
"That Sounds Like A Very Good Idea! Possibly For All Of Our Guests! After All, We Don't Know How Long They'll Be Staying. That Being Said, It's Probably Best If We Call Them Extended Family, And Not Alternate... Us-es. I Will Get Them All A Copy Of The Required Paperwork."   
"Thanks Paps! I'll go let Black know."   
"WAIT. I AM VERY INTERESTED IN GETTING A JOB, HOWEVER," Edge calls out, and you smile, your suspicion from earlier confirmed, "I WOULD… APPRECIATE… IT IF I COULD HAVE SOME HELP WITH FINDING A JOB THATS RIGHT FOR ME. I DO NOT SEE MYSELF BEING VERY USEFUL IN AN OFFICE SETTING, DESPITE HOW GREAT AND TERRIBLE I AM."   
"Sure thing my guy, we can all sit down and talk about it when we get your IDs." 

And that was that on that. You told Blackberry, who gave you that same tired and relieved smile as the night before, and you had to beat down the butterflies in your stomach. 

And then some changes happen. A few weeks go by and suddenly all of the skeletons have _jobs_ , and you get to quit one of your two jobs, which is really nice, and you have more free time but no one else does and everyone works different schedules and you kind of miss when everyone was around. Then another few weeks go by and everything evens out. The S-Types, as you've found yourself calling them (in your head), are often working on the machine. You go down and visit them every once in a while.

"Hey guys I brought some burgers from Grillbyz. Didn't feel like cooking."   
"m sure paps was happy about that." Sans says, immediately teleporting over to you and grabbing a burger.   
"I don't think he minds too much, I think all of them are worried about you guys."  
"you worried too, doll?"   
Red has made it his personal mission to scare you all of the time, which was terrible at first but it backfired because you've become used to it. He wraps an arm around your shoulders as he grabs a burger.  
"Mm. A little bit."   
He eats it lightening fast and then gets back to work, not even pausing to drench it in mustard.   
"You guys should take a break tomorrow. I think that everyone has the day off, maybe we could see a movie or something…" you muse. Mutt walks over and plops down into a chair. You set the rest of the burgs down on the desk and he digs in.   
"doll, i think you got some hair stuck in my ulna."   
"You're the one who put your arm in the danger zone."   
"woah."   
You glance over, your comeback wasn't _that_ good, but the machine is glowing, and Sans immediately teleports over, staring the machine down. Red gets up and starts to walk away and the glow lessens slightly. Sans plucks the hair delicately out of Red's arm and holds it closer to the machine, and the glow returns.   
_What the fuck_.  
"holy shit. _____ come over here."   
You walk over slowly, the glow from the machine growing brighter with each step you take.  
" _What the fuck_?" You ask, and Red shakes his head.   
"classic." He says, tone saying 'its time', and you can't help but wonder what it's time for.  
"_____… can i take out your soul?" He asks, and you give him a look.  
"I thought that was something super… intimate."  
"it is. but-"  
"Ok."   
He seems surprised that you'd just let him, but god, this is Sans. Easily your best friend, you're pretty sure you're in love with him and you trust him with your life. With your Soul. Even the skeletons you've met only recently you trust implicitly and you don't know why, you just know that they feel _right_.  
"just relax, honey." Stretch is behind you, a hand comforting on your shoulder, thumb rubbing circles into your tense muscles. You relax and nod to Sans. 

It's a sort of pinching sensation, not painful but uncomfortable for just a second, then you just feel warm.  
And then all you see for a moment is a bright, bright green. All of the skeletons in the room seem to crowd around it and you feel a pulsing in your chest, in your _Soul_ , and the machine is glowing green and when you finally look away, into Sans eyes, he looks in awe. They all do, all of them transfixed and you can't help but feel like this is scratching an itch you never knew you had, you can't help but feel right like this, feel _loved_ like this. 

"Sans…" you say, and the look he gives you is so loaded, so full of emotion.  
"we uh... we're soulmates." He says, and Red clears his throat.  
"we're all technically your soulmate, doll. matching souls." His tone is confident but when you look at him he's sweating, staring at your soul. Your turn to look at Stretch, and he's starting at you, your face.   
"you ok, honey?" He asks, and you nod. Skeletal fingers caress your cheek and you suddenly realize that you were crying.  
"Is this because of the machine thing, or has it been-" you can't finish the sentence. Have you and Sans been soulmates this entire time? Three years and neither of you noticed? Three years?   
"the whole time." This time Mutt speaks up, (and for a moment Sans is worried Mutt's going to tell you that he _knew_ the entire time but he doesn't) and you turn back to Sans, who is staring down at your Soul with intense concentration.

And then Sans slowly reaches out and gently strokes down the right side of your Soul. The feeling it gives you is overwhelming. You feel tears fall freely as something clicks into place and you feel more _correct_ , like a puzzle being pieced together. Sans face moves from reverent to concerned very suddenly, and you can feel his worry in your Soul.

 

You look back down and when your eyes adjust to the light again you notice something wrong, something you missed the first time.

 

There's a dark black rot on the left side of your heart shaped Soul.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title from I'm Down by Calvin Johnson, one of my favorite songs right now.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shorter chapter bc I've had writer's block and I kinda just wanted to push it out. Important information in this one! Next one too, probably.

"oh no, _sweetheart_." It's Stretch who speaks first.   
"W-what is it? What does it mean?" The elation and confusion from discovering that Sans, your _best friend seemingly unrequited crush Sans_ , is your soulmate is very quickly overtaken by a dreading concern.  
"it means… it means your soul is damaged. possibly irreparably. and it means that in order for everyone to get back-" Sans pushes your Soul back into you and it feels kind of wrong, now that you know. He refuses to meet your gaze.  
"we're probably gonna need all of _our_ yous to be in the vicinity of the machine." Mutt finishes, and Stretch clears his throat awkwardly.  
"that's… not going to be possible."   
"why not." It's not a question, the way Sans says it, and you reach a hand out and try to touch him but he stops you. You feel your Soul pang in your chest.  
"she died."  
Silence fills the room. You look over to Sans who still isn't looking at you and you _know_ that behind all of his anger at this helpless situation he blames himself for whatever this Soul rot stuff is. You feel a pang in your chest.   
"And the colors have meanings?"   
"yes. green is… it's kindness." Mutt, who had been standing behind you to the other side of Stretch answers you, then places a hand on your shoulder.  
"come on, come sit down. you've been through a lot."   
You let him lead you to a chair and this time when you look up at him he's looking down at you with this look of absolute adoration on his face, a far cry from the usual lecherous smirk or disinterested grin.   
"Why are you looking at me like that?" You ask, and he just shakes his head at you. You let it go.   
The next series of events happen very quickly, and you honestly miss most of it because you're picking at a burger and trying to wrap your head around it all. 

 

"so we're never going back?" Red asks quietly, and Sans can't miss the relief in his voice.   
"looks like it."  
"why is there _rot_?" Stretch sounds panicked. Sans was honestly still reeling from touching your soul, and still feeling immense guilt for not telling you sooner, maybe it's his fault, is it his fault your Soul has rot on it? Mutt claps him on the shoulder.  
"don't internalise."   
"r-right. we need to do research, need to figure out how to get rid of it." _What caused it_. He looks over to you, sitting there sort of eating a greasy Grillbyz burger.   
He's still reeling from the rush that one gets from touching your soulmate's Soul, but _goddamn_ you look beautiful, even when you're just eating a stupid greasy burger, even when your soul is dying and it's his fault. He turns back to the others.   
"we'll need to tell them about… the rest of you." The cards are stacked against him and it's his fault. He left your relationship open, ambiguous. He ignored that you were soulmates and now he had _competition_ , and it wasn't fair to the rest of them who suddenly got a second chance at a soulmate to deny them the chance, no matter how much he wanted to take you far away from this mess. He sighs, and moves toward you quietly. 

"kid, we should talk. when you're ready." He says, and you swallow, then nod at him.  
"I'm ready now, Sans," You say, and you set the burger down, "but we should probably take this upstairs."   
"right."   
"And tell the P-types."  
"right. wait. what?"  
"They deserve to know. They live here, and they're my friends."   
"they don't need to worry, paps doesn't need to worry." Sans says, and you raise a brow at him.  
"well my paps will want to know." Red speaks up this time, and Mutt follows up with a quiet agreement. You start to muster up the energy to stand but anxiety pits in your stomach and the monsters around you all seem to notice.   
"I'll... I think I'm not ready yet."  
"ill take you to your room." Mutt says, a hand suddenly around your waist.   
And you're suddenly there.   
"do you want us to wait for you to tell them?"   
"No, I… I don't need to be there."   
"we can give them the run down. then we can all talk, and i uh... im sorry, for the record. we all knew when we got here and no one… told you."   
"You... You all knew?"   
"right when we saw you."   
And they didn't tell you? Had Sans known since you met him?   
"Had Sans-"  
"youll have to ask him." Mutt turns as if to walk away, then seemingly thinks better of it and turns back to you and pulls you into a tight hug.   
You cling back tightly, nuzzling into his soft jacket sweater.   
"I'm gonna kill him." You say, "And I forgive you."   
"thanks." And then he turns and is gone. 

You don't know what to do with any of this information. You feel like you've had a knot worked out that's been tight in your back for three years. You feel empty and simultaneously so, so full.   
Why didn't Sans tell you?   
Your room is slightly messy, and the late day light that filters in catches on the dust motes floating around. You should really clean up, you think, so you do. It doesn't take much time, it's something to get your mind off of the issues at hand.   
When you're finished you lay down on your bed, and you think.


End file.
